South Africans Seek Meaning To Shooting

South Africans are in dismay from the shooting of Reeva Steenkamp.

On February 14th, Steenkamp's life ended when her Paralympian boyfriend, Oscar Pistrious shot her three times. Steenkamp and Pistrious dated for four months and during this time Steenkamp gained some fame that she wanted to use to make a difference.

The day prior to her death, she was preparing for a speech against the violence towards women. Prior to her relationship with Pistrious, Steenkamp experienced first hand experience with an abusive relationship "...and wanted passionately speak out on it", said her best friend, Gina Myers. "She said that people chose to be ignorant because the subject made them uncomfortable."

Now, South Africans debate if Steenkamp is a victim of national addiction on self-defense and crime, or if she died from the same domestic violence she was trying to fight against.

South Africa's prosecutors sees Pistorius as a reckless, hothead young man with jealous behavior and decline his unrealistic version of the events that occurred on Feb. 14th:

Pistorious seemed to be consumed with personal safety. He slept with a gun by his bed and a cricket bat was kept in arms reach. On the tragic night, "...he [Pistorius] thought an intruder was in the house. Not wearing his prosthetic legs, feeling vulnerable in the pitch dark and too scared to turn on the lights, the track star pulled his 9mm pistol from beneath his bed, moved toward the bathroom and fired into the door. It was only after he called to girlfriend Reeva Steenkamp -- whom he thought had been in bed beside him after a quiet evening -- that he realized something horrible might have happened..."

South Africans are in a hysteria of self-examination because some view it as a reminder to the violence in South Africa. Many whites, like Pistorius, live in heavily protected, gated, blocked-off and surveillance communities. Yet with all of the protection, most still feel threatened by the black majority and fear attack, so they take matters into their own hands.

Ms. Steenkamp's death grabs the spotlight on violence against women in South Africa and across the world, as well as soul searching about the macho culture of South African men, “This is very much linked to a dominant South African masculinity in which guns are an archetypal symbol of masculine strength,” said Rachel Jewkes, director of the Gender and Health Research Unit of the South African Medical Research Council.

If there is a WILL, there is a way <3

I never thought I could love someone so much; he's my heart and I can't picture my life without him...

Stop the Denial

I know in love with you..knew it from the moment I meet you

I'm in love with you, in love with you..

1 8 B A R S . . .

Lately...my emotions been Fucked up.
Like I'm guaranteed to fuck up.
I guess just screwed up.
I just need to fuckin grow up.
Money ambitious, need to get my fuckin gawp up.
Then I stop up, so I can cry a bit.
But then again I always seem to stop that shit.
What you bout bitch?
You ain't nothing, you can kiss my ass if you get far you lucky.
Every time I see you I just think of my future and shit...
Got me me thinkin if you gon be my fuckin main and shit..
Sometimes I wanna to forget all the time we spent...
Are you my fuckin soulmate? We don't know bout shit...
Can you walk out the fuck out my mind? I don't want the times that we spent like we out of time...
I'm not Denzel, only time will tell.
Don't want to be that muthafucka in love living in hell.
I keep it 100, like I'm Chris Brown, now let me run it while you sitting in the background.

I don&apos;t want to, but I want you

I cannot lie, I feeling your vibe
I don't want to, but I want you.
You got this sexy thing about you,
That intrigues me to always think about you.
I don't want to, but I want you.
I could never fall in love with you, or be in a relationship.
I don't want to, but I want you.
I like the way we can talk and everything feels natural. You finish my thoughts, I finish yours.
I don't want to but I want you.
Im trying get you feeling right, all night.
Make your body orgasm, make you scream my name, make you play my game..my way.
Ain't nothing to but to do.
But like I said, I don't want to, but I want you.

The truth?

You don't mean nothing
I don't want ya
I don't need ya
I never loved ya
You're a nobody
You'll never make it
You're a mistake...

when you ready you ready, and when you not you not. period.

I'm ready now.

Ready For Love

I am ready for love
Why are you hiding from me?
I quickly get my freedom,
to be held in your captivity.

I am ready for love
All of the joy and the pain
And all the time that it takes,
just to stay in your good grace.

Lately, I been thinking maybe
your not ready for me.
Maybe you think I need to learn maturity

They say watch what you ask for
cause you might recieve
But if you ask me tomorrow,
I'll say the same thing.

I am ready for love.
Could you please lend me your ear?
I promise I won't complain.
I just need you to acknowledge I am here.

If you give me half a chance
I'll prove this to you.
I will be patient, kind, faithful, and true.

To a man who loves music,
A man who loves art,
respects the spirit world,
And thinks with his heart.

I am ready for love.
If you'll take me in your hand?
I will learn what you teach,
and do the best that I can.

I am ready for love
Here with a offering of:
My voice,
My eyes,
My soul,
My mind.

Tell me, what is enough to prove
I am ready for love?
I am ready.

The God honest truth is, I am terribly lonely...and I'm okay with that =)

An Atheist Professor of Philosophy was speaking to his Class on the problem Science has with God, the Almighty. He asked one of his new Christian students to stand.

Professor: You are a Christian, aren’t you, son?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, you believe in God?
Student: Absolutely, sir.
Professor: Is God good?
Student: Sure.
Professor: My brother died of cancer, even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn’t. How is God good, then? Hmm?
(Student was silent)
Professor: You can’t answer, can you? Let’s start again, young fella. Is God good?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Is Satan good?
Student: No.
Professor: Where does Satan come from?
Student: From.. God.
Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Student: Yes.
Professor: So who created evil?
(Student didn’t answer)
Professor: Is there sickness? Immortality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, who created them?
(Student had no answer)
Professor: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son.. have you ever seen God?
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your God.
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God, for that matter?
Student: No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.
Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?
Student: Yes.
Professor: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, Science says your God doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student: Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor: Yes, Faith. And that is the problem Science has.
Student: Professor, is there such a thing as Heat?
Professor: Yes.
Student: And is there such a thing as Cold?
Professor: Yes.
Student: No, sir, there isn’t.
(The Lecture Theatre became very quiet with this turn of events)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of Heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
(There was a pon-drop silence in the Lecture Theatre)
Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?
Student: You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have Low Light, Normal Light, Bright Light, Flashing Light… But if you have No Light constantly, you have nothing and it’s called Darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, You would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?
Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student: Sir, my point is, your Philosophical Premise is flawed.
Professor: Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student: Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Professor: If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes of course, I do.
Student: Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going)
Student: Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher?
(The class was in uproar)
Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?
(The class broke out into laughter)
Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? .. No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable and Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures?
(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable)
Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student: That is it, sir.. exactly! The link between man and God is Faith. That is all that keeps things alive and moving!
That student was Albert Einstein.

All I Ever Think About...

All I ever think about is you and I guess I never really ever loved no one. All I ever think about is you, from the rising of the moon to the setting of the sun. It's overwhelming and I'm feeling so confused. I'm really scared lying here about to fall,cause all I ever think about is you. Tryna get back, yeah I wanna get back to you, cause all I ever think about is you.

I'm down with you baby it gets so hard for me to focus. I'll say a prayer so that nothing happens to you, waiting on your phone call saying baby wont you come back to me. And when you get back I cant wait to hug and kiss you, cant wait to demonstrate just how much I miss you. You take my breath away, no other way to say...All I ever think about is you

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Go ahead, text him first, he might be checking his phone, waiting for you. Stare into the eyes of the person you like and memorize the color. turn on your ipod and run as far as you can. Say hi to a stranger, you never know what they’ll become to you. Have a mental health day – you know you need it. Don’t go on facebook for a day and see what you can accomplish. Give money to a charity, your good karma will come around eventually. Sneak out, you might get caught, but it’ll be 100% worth it. Tell that one person that you like them, what's the worst that can happen? he doesn't like you back? Then he doesn’t deserve you anyways, right? Treat yourself to something indulgent, you deserve it. Smile at a stranger, it could make their day. Wink, it’s sexy and makes you feel confident, after all, you are pretty hot ;). go for somebody who is totally wrong for you, they may not be totally wrong after all. Stand up for yourself, because if you don’t, who will. Moral of the story is it's 2011, start living your dream life that you've always wanted, after all.. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.

Wanna Be Loved

Don't feel no pity for me
Cause I'm going through a couple things,
Life means change,
That's the way it goes,
All my life I had a constant burning
A strong deep,desire
An aching ambiguous,yearning.
yearning

For something better
For something bigger
For something wider
For something higher
And lots of regrets
Cause I ain't seem to found it yet
I've been searching around the world
Never knowing what to expect
I get sad sometimes
Yes I be mad sometimes
Cause I'm out here on the grind
Making mine
And I still can't seem to find
What I've been looking for
Opened so many doors
For real,yo
I just wanna be loved...

I Come To You More Than I Give

When the time comes for us to pray,

We find other things to say.

Instead of giving thanks for what

God has already done,

we're asking for more.

But with a grateful heart

we ouught to pray.

"Lord let your will be done

and if you never give me

another thing I'll just

thank you for forgiving me"

I come to you more than I give..

Always with my hands out,

instead of lifting them up.

Oh, Lord will you give

me another chance?

Always with my hands out,

instead of giving myself enough to say.

Lord I know that I'm in

your perfect will, realizing as

ungrateful as I've been.

The giving you has removed all sin.

I vow right now to never be the same

I come to you more

Than I give

Always with my hands out

Instead of me lifting

Them up

I come to you more

Than I give

Oh Lord, I'm sorry

Romans 12:1 said,

"I beseech you therefore

Bretheren

By the mercies of God

That ye present your bodies

A living sacrifice

Holy, which is your job"

Unto God, it is your job

To give him everything

Every part of you

I give you my heart

My mind, my soul

My praise, my money

It all belongs to the Father

I give it all to you

I give you my heart

My mind, my soul, my praise

Hallelujah

I Come To You More Than I Give - Kim Burrell

cat has let loose..

I've held me tongue long enough.
I've put up and shut up, until I'm saying
"I don't give a fuck!"
The cat let loose of my tongue.

They say a closed mouth don't get fed
But how do you get fed without being
Encouraged? With nourishment?
In this situation I still ain't got fed.
They cat let loose of my tongue.

Honey, don't worry about me or
Think I'm butt-hurt cause I decline.
Don't think I'm being unreasonable and
Dramatic, cause I decline.
....Wait a minute?

Wait a minute?
Matter of fact,
You can think that all you want.
Like I said I don't give a fuck anymore,
The cat let loose of my tongue.

Respect my opinion just as I respect yours.
Be upset be mad, but do it behind closed doors.
Reason being? You really want to know?

With that reaction,
the cat will now and forever hold me tongue.

today is the day i've been waiting for, for a long time, this is my favorite month of the year, Dear October..

Perfect Quote for the weekend of September 11th - 13th

<3

Love Rain

Love rain down on me

Met him on a Thursday, sunny afternoon
Cumulus clouds, 84 degrees
He was brown, deep
Said he wanted to talk about my mission
Listen to my past lives

Took me on long walks to places where butterflies rest easy
Talked about Moses and Mumia
Reparations, blue colors, memories of shell topped Adidas
He was fresh, like summer peaches
Sweet on my mind like block parties and penny candy
Us was nice and warm, no jacket, no umbrella, just warm

At night we would watch the stars
And he would physically give me each and every one
I felt like cayenne pepper, red, hot, spicy
I felt Dizzy, Sonya, heaven, and Miles between my thighs
Better than love,we made delicious.

He me had, had me he
He made me tongue tied
I could hear his rhythm in my thoughts
I was his sharp, his horn section
His boom and his bip
And he was my love

Love rain down on me.

The rain was fallin and slowly
and sweetly and stinging my eyes
And I could not see that he became my voodoo priest
And I was his faithful concubine

Wide open, wide,
loose like bowels after collard greens
The mistake was made
Love slipped from my lips
Dripped down my chin and landed in his lap
And us became new

Now me non-clairvoyant and in love
Made the coochie easy and the obvious invisible
The rain was falling
And I couldn't see the season changing
And the vibe slipping off it's axis

Our beautiful melody became wildly staccato
The rain was falling and I could not see
That I was to be plowed and sowed and fertilized
And left to drown in his sunny afternoon
Cumulus clouds,84 degrees,melody

The mistake was made
Love slipped from my lip, dripped down
my chin and landed in his lap
And us, became new,
me non-clairvoyant and in love
Made me the fool
You were never true
If you didn't want me, ahh
You should have let me know
Instead you made a mockery of everything
I thought we'd be
I honestly did love you.

Love rain down on me.

Bottom's Up ft. Nicki Minaj (Choreography) Chrysta "Texas" West SI7